We are all doing the best we can. This has been my motto for a long time, and it feels magnified right now, as this pandemic rages on into its second calendar year. We’re doing the best we can for a tenth month of worrying about exposure, working from home, acting as parents-slash-educators, and coping with heightened stress all the time, add on holidays and new year expectations.
My hope is that we bring into the new year gentler expectations, of ourselves and everyone else. We are surviving. That is enough. I hope that you give yourself praise every single day for surviving. If you manage to do more than that some days, maybe even wearing real pants or saying something thoughtful in the zoom meeting, then I hope that you celebrate big.
First step toward gentler expectations? Stop comparing. It doesn’t matter how well it looks like someone else is doing at this. A) You don’t have the whole story, and B) no one is winning any prizes for coping the “best” right now. We are all surviving, in our own unique, challenging, amazing ways. When you recognize that you’re comparing yourself to someone else, or setting resolutions or goals based on someone else’s standard: Stop, Drop, and Roll. Stop making equivalencies between your struggles and someone else’s. Drop the idea that there is a “right,” “wrong,” or “better” way to do this. Roll with your own emotions, and allow them to inform you of your next step. What would make YOU a little happier, in this moment? What is YOUR hope for yourself? What are YOU grateful for, in your own life?
